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"This is gonna be a slobberknocker . . ."
| Jim Ross, or Good Ol' J.R., is the chief play-by-play announcer for the WWE. It's his job to call the wrestling matches and make them more exciting for the viewers at home. He's considered the best in the business and there's no denying his talent - his enthusiasm and obvious love for the business comes through every time. However J.R. probably doesn't realise just how over-the-top he goes, and how funny this is for us watching at home. You can count on J.R to exaggerate things almost to the point of stupidity, and to almost lose his voice during the main event for getting so wound up. It's just quality! I've decided to dedicate a page of the Shrine of Kirsten to J.R.'s sayings; if I've left any out don't hesitate to e-mail me! |
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| Good
God Allmighty!
It's a normal Saturday night on pay-day weekend!
Look at the carnage! He's got a vicious meanstreak! It looks like a Goddamn car/plane/train wreck! This is gonna be a slobberknocker! GOOD GOD, THAT KILLED HIM! He's crazier than a pet coon! This will not be for the weak of heart! He's a bloody mess! The intensity is OFF... THE... PAGE! Through HELL, FIRE and BRIMSTONE! What an arrogant ASS! What is she NOT wearing? He's being whipped like a government mule! Business is about to pick up! He's broken in HALF! Somebody stop the DAMN MATCH! I've never seen anything like that in my life! Break his DAMN ANKLE! He's a vile human being! Kiss my BIG OKLAHOMA BUTT! This ain't gonna be no wrestling match! Corporate butt-kissers! Psychotic SON OF A BITCH! You think you're a KING! AHH SHUT UP! I'm disappointed in that man . . . What else will happen? What a vile, detestable act . . . I'll bet the farm on it! He's just a cry-baby! Need some chapstick King? He's an incredible athlete, I'll give you that . . . He got folded up like an accordion! He's been busted wide open! This is just disrespectful . . . Someway, somehow, HE KICKED OUT! Good God, what a suplex/powerslam/ddt! (etc) Have you ever seen anything like this, King? Paul Heyman is a haemorrhoid on the ass of life! He's running like a scalded dog . . . Take him to the woodshed! He's on Dream Street! He's wearing the proverbial Crimson Mask! Don't do that! Don't do that! This kid's got a lot of heart. He's out of his DAMN MIND! This has turned into a street-fight! You won't see too many holds in this match! They are the high-flyers, the dare-devils, the risk-takers . . . Some idiot drinking a beer is saying they know how to fall! |
